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I think we’re meant to stay in the in-betweens. It’s the best way to keep whatever we would want to keep and distancing ourselves from any kind of tragic ending that we constantly foresee us getting into if we ever surpassed the line of being “just friends”.

When we’re in between, we can flirt without any caution and you’d brush your hands on mine without hesitation because we both know we won’t mount up to anything serious despite us wanting to. We can’t, because we simply don’t believe in it enough you don’t believe that you have what it takes and I don’t believe in being able to love you the way I want to. It’s sad and ironic I know but I think it’s best we stay as “in betweens”.

We don’t have to feel obliged to anything more than friends but we can allow ourselves to feel all the emotions we would want to feel as if we’re together. Loving each other without responsibility. It’s unsustainable and it’ll burn out. Hell, it’s been 6 years and I still love you. There’s never an end to it but we’ve never dared to put a start to our story. We’re constantly caught in between and that just seems to be the only way we can make us work, I’m starting to realise.

So that’s fine, and that’s okay. You can love me from afar and not act on it because you’re afraid. I’m afraid, too. If one day you gathered the courage to ask me to love you, I’d think twice because we’ve always stayed in safe greys and never in the honest truth that maybe, just maybe this isn’t that much of a fight.